A Man After God’s Own Heart
#2 - A Friend
1 Samuel 18:1- 5
by Rev. John R. Hannem,
Have you ever been in a crowd of strangers where you didn’t know anyone and it seemed like no one there was your friend? Have you ever been lonely and friendless in a crowd of thousands? It’s not a very nice feeling is it?
Friendship is a powerful need in our lives. Most of us don’t have an overabundance of real, true friends ... someone you can share with and someone you can count on. In fact, a person without friends is a person in utter poverty… even if that individual has all the wealth in the world.
There’s the story of three mischievous boys went to the zoo one day for an outing. They decided to visit the elephant cage, but soon enough, they were picked up by the security guards for causing a commotion. The officer hauled them off to the security office for questioning. The supervisor in charge asked them to give their names and tell what they were doing at the elephant cage.
The first boy innocently said, "My name is
The second added, "My name is Larry, and all I was doing was throwing peanuts into the elephant cage."
The third boy was a little more shaken up than the other two and said, "Well, my name is Peter, but my friends call me Peanuts."
Just recently,
When asked to claim his body, his nearest relative, a distant cousin, exclaimed: “Is this Mr. Hughes?”
When he died, not a single acquaintance or relative mourned his death. The only honor he received was a moment of silence in his
Let me repeat: People without friends are people who live in utter poverty. For most people, friendship is one of their deepest needs and deepest desires.
Now, Scripture tells us that David was a man after God’s own heart. And Psalms 37:4 says delight yourself in the LORD and he will give you the desires of your heart.
So, as you might imagine, since David was a man after God’s own heart - a man who delighted in the LORD – God supplied him with a close companion – a REAL friend. A friend named Jonathan. And this was not just any friend… this was a SON OF THE KING.
This friendship between David & Jonathan was so powerful and so true, that it has been practically a Biblical standard of friendship ever since.
At this point in our story, David is a very fortunate and popular young man. Not only has he has just killed Goliath - the champion of the Philistines – and thus become the beloved hero of the people… But David has also been the personal servant of King Saul. Before the incident with Goliath, David had already been a regular visitor to the King’s palace. Saul had been plagued by an evil Spirit and only the singing of David could alleviate his torment. But now that David has slain the giant, Saul makes David a permanent part of his family. ..... And… not only is David a favorite of the people, and a favorite of the King… but God Himself has honored David by selecting him to be the next king of
For example… let’s read the next few verses in this chapter - I Samuel 18: 5-11
Whatever Saul sent him to do, David did it so successfully that Saul gave him a high rank in the army. This pleased all the people, and Saul’s officers as well.
When the men were returning home after David had killed the Philistine, the women came out from all the towns of
Saul was very angry; this refrain galled him. "They have credited David with tens of thousands," he thought, "but me with only thousands. What more can he get but the kingdom?" And from that time on Saul kept a jealous eye on David.
The next day an evil spirit from God came forcefully upon Saul. He was prophesying in his house, while David was playing the harp, as he usually did. Saul had a spear in his hand and he hurled it, saying to himself, "I’ll pin David to the wall." But David eluded him twice.
You see, King Saul became jealous over David’s popularity, and a number of times Saul attempted to kill young David. Eventually, David needed to flee for his life, but even then, Saul pursued him into the wilderness to destroy him.
David HAD BEEN a very blessed man, but he soon came to understand that there are times when life gets hard… things go wrong… and the experiences of life are harsh.
We all need friends, friends who will be there for us when life gets hard.
As one person put it: We need “someone who will walk in when the rest of the world walks out.” And, that’s why God gave David a friend like Jonathan.
II. What kind of friend did God give David?
We’re given a very detailed description of what kind of friend Jonathan was to David. And I believe that this is NO coincidence. I believe God gives us this description for a purpose. So, let’s examine the “details” of what made Jonathan’s friendship so powerful:
1st –this friendship started in Jonathan’s heart - 1 Samuel 18:1 After David had finished talking with Saul, Jonathan became one in spirit with David, and he loved him as himself.
2nd –Jonathan made a commitment to David - 1 Samuel 18:3 And Jonathan made a covenant with David because he loved him as himself.
3rd –Jonathan was willing to share whatever he owned with David - 1 Samuel 18:4 Jonathan took off the robe he was wearing and gave it to David, along with his tunic, and even his sword, his bow and his belt.
III. Now, why would God want us to see this type of friendship? What is God’s purpose in showing us this friendship in the pages of scripture?
I believe it’s because this is the kind of friendship God wants us to have with each other. When Jesus died on the cross, He did so to give us forgiveness of sins and a whole new life… but He also had another reason: Jesus came and died upon the cross to create something. He came to create “the church.” We (the church) are His bride whom He is preparing for the great Wedding Banquet.
I believe that the friendship Jonathan displayed toward David is the same kind of friendship we should have for one another in the church.
When God created the church, His intention was to create an atmosphere of friendship that is modeled for us in the friendship that existed between Jonathan and David.
God’s church is to be a group of saved people who are 1. Changed in their hearts, so that they could learn to love others
In book of Isaiah chapter 11 - the 1st few verses of this chapter have a beautiful description of Jesus’ earthly ministry. Then verse 10 of Isaiah 11 is quoted by Paul and he cites it as a description of the church of his day (Romans ).
So, verse 1 refers to Jesus and his reason for coming and verse 10 refers to the
“The wolf will live with the lamb, the leopard will lie down with the goat, the calf and the lion and the yearling together; and a little child will lead them. The cow will feed with the bear, their young will lie down together, and the lion will eat straw like the ox. The infant will play near the hole of the cobra, and the young child put his hand into the viper’s nest. They will neither harm nor destroy on all my holy mountain, for the earth will be full of the knowledge of the LORD as the waters cover the sea” (Isaiah 11:6-9).
Now, there are some who teach that this is some future event… but it’s not. God is telling us that there are people here in His church who used to be - wolves, - lions,
- snakes in the grass .... And there are others amongst us who have been as - Meek as lambs,- Gentle as new-born calves.- Innocent as children.
Who would think that those kinds of people could live together and survive? Well… they couldn’t. They’d tear each other apart. That’s their way of life. That’s how they live. People who are vicious and mean spirited could never live together in the same building… that is unless God changed their HEARTS. Well God has saved us. He has changed us. And He has showed us how to love each other. As John wrote: We love because he first loved us. (1 John 4:19)
God CHANGED our hearts so that we could be friends with each other. That’s why God created His church.
2ndly, God created His church for us so that we could be Committed to each other
Hebrews 10:24-25 tells us that we should “consider how we may spur one another on toward love and good deeds. Let us not give up meeting together, as some are in the habit of doing, but let us encourage one another— and all the more as you see the Day approaching.”
What does that mean? It means that God wants us to be committed to each other.
It means that God wants us to work at making each other successful. God wants us to think of ways - To help each other learn how to love - To help each other find good deeds that we can do together - And He wants us to find ways to encourage one another. God wants us to think this way… not just within these four walls, but also when we are working and dealing with each other throughout the week.
A man I was talking with last week told me about his experience in another church. The people would be very nice to each other during their time in the church building… but once they left those doors they became an entirely different kind of people. They abused and misused each other. Why did they behave that way? It’s because they didn’t understand how crucial and important this issue was to God. They didn’t understand that this was key to showing love to God.
(pause…) In the Gospel of John we read about Peter sitting by a fire on the shores of the sea of Galilee, talking with Jesus. They’d just got done eating breakfast together when Jesus looks Peter in the eye and says: "Simon son of John, do you truly love me more than these?" "Yes, Lord," he said, "you know that I love you." Jesus said, "FEED MY LAMBS." ..... Again Jesus said, "Simon son of John, do you truly love me?" He answered, "Yes, Lord, you know that I love you." Jesus said, "TAKE CARE OF MY SHEEP." ..... The third time Jesus said to him, "Simon son of John, do you love me?"
Peter was hurt because Jesus asked him the third time, "Do you love me?" He said, "Lord, you know all things; you know that I love you." Jesus said, "FEED MY SHEEP.
If we love Jesus… we will take care of each other… look out for each other. We’ll love each other, because that is THE way we show that we love Him.
LASTLY, God created His church for us so that we might be there as friends to share with each other
In Galatians 6:9-10 Paul tells us “Let us not become weary in doing good, for at the proper time we will reap a harvest if we do not give up. Therefore, as we have opportunity, let us do good to all people, especially to those who belong to the family of believers.”
In our family we have four children. When they were growing up every once in a while they would invite their friends over and those friends would eat our food, play on our computer, watch our TV and sometimes even sleep over night in our beds. We did GOOD for those kids because they were friends with my kids. But eventually they had to go home. ..... However, MY KIDS are different. They are part of MY FAMILY. I’ll do good for their friends… but I’ll especially do good for them, because they ARE my family. That’s what Paul is talking about in Galatians 6. We should do good to ALL people, but ESPECIALLY to those who are part of our family.
And I have to tell you that I have been humbled over the past few months at the way in which I’ve watched people in this congregation do that for each other. (gave a few examples).
(pause…) But, now… wait a minute. Here you are pastor, telling us that God expects us to be friends to each other. But… I want my own friend. I want somebody who’ll always be there for me. I want someone who’ll do good things for me. Someone who will watch my back and protect and listen to me. I want someone who will always be there for me!
Well, God has supplied you with that kind of a friend. He’s supplied you with someone who’ll ALWAYS be there for you. Someone who will never leave you.
Someone who will never forsake you
Remember how I told you that God loved David so much that he didn’t give just any old friend. God gave David the son of the King for his friend.
Likewise, God didn’t give you just any old friend. We have the Son of the King - Jesus - as our friend. Proverbs speaks of Him as “a friend that sticks closer than a brother.”
CLOSE: You know, the very MENTION of Jesus as our friend has the power to calm our souls and give us the comfort we need in our lives… even if we’re not Christians.
Syndicated columnist Deborah Mathis wrote about a day in her life when he was passing through Union Station in
The first thing stamped on her memory was the noise and the sounds. The public address announcer calling out arrivals and departures. Scores of pagers, walkie-talkies, and cell phones crying out for someone’s attention. You could hear horns honking,
machines clinking out change, and babies crying.There were voices from every direction. A nervous security guard yelled at a man about to enter a forbidden area.
Three women stood up from their bench in order to press the points of their squabble with more emphasis. The man in line in front of her was pacing in tiny, agitated steps.
Then she heard someone singing. "What a friend we have in Jesus, All our sins and griefs to bear; What a privilege to carry Everything to God in prayer."
She wrote there was a noticeable change that came over the crowd.
"O what peace we often forfeit, O what needless pain we bear, All because we do not carry Everything to God in prayer."
The quarreling women quit their arguing and quietly took their seats. Tense shoulders seemed to relax. As the lone voice sang the remaining verses of from the song Mathis realized she was singing along with them now. So were the three women who had been bickering. And several more.
"Nice, huh?" offered the man who had been pacing his tiny, tight circle in front of her. "I don’t even believe in Jesus, but that’s nice."
What a friend God has give to us in the person of Jesus Christ .... the very MENTION of Jesus as our friend has the power to calm our souls and give us the comfort we need in our lives.
#528 – No One Ever Cared For Me Like Jesus